One thing at a time, is there really time for that?

Sigh. Here she is - the do-to list:

* School - do PSC study guide and actually...study; History stuff - come up with term paper idea (help?) and study for exam - same day as PSC; math-keep plugging along

* Home - clean - clean - clean

* Misc but not forgotten - love my boyz, get veggies for book club - oh and finish the book, fill out tremendous amount of paperwork you should have done three weeks ago, keep journal for WW - only a few more weeks till we hit 10!, BREATH

Oh and somewhere in here...I somehow just decided it was really important to paint my nails, while a paper was printing. The shiny Aubergine makes me smile - so I guess that's something!

It's been a while...

Here are the scarves I made for my Book Club Chicas. They were so easy and very well received!

It's funny that it's been so long since I've posted - I can't remember what I've been doing with my time? Oh. Right. School.

I had a pity-party moment yesterday afternoon about how hard school was, how much work I was putting in. Blah, Blah, Blah....Then I decided to check the want ads....Suddenly, I LOVE being in school! Doesn't take much for me to be reminded about all I have to be grateful for! I'm blessed with a wonderful family (especially J, the Bug, my parents...); I have good health (even with the Bruxism - google it - it's funny); and I'm warm and well fed (thanks dept of agr.)!

Statistics like you wouldn't believe...

This is not my usual soap-box post. The title is for real - I'm taking statistics. Online. Yeah, you heard right. Online. Crazy for me to think that a class I got a C+ in (because I never went) I could get a B or better in (here's hoping for an A, for real) just by going to class in my bedroom.

Amazing how technology helped me in a way I never knew - it's given me the wonderful "R" word - regret - that I didn't just do this right the first time.

Oh well...

Random Bullets

*Down 6.2 pounds. It's a pretty good start for my first week and a half.

*Working on back-to-school stuff...it's exciting, mostly.

*Sleeping till one for the last weekday until spring break.

*Working on scarves (picture post soon), and reading books right and left.

*Soooo excited about our new prez and the work he's already doing and hope for the future.

*Going out with J tonight - kinda like a date...I'm claiming it as a date.

*Working on a post about my issue with hearing things I don't want to hear.

ON again off again

I'm back on the WW wagon. I went to a meeting with ww J last week and discovered I'm six pounds away from where I started the first time! (At least it's six pounds less) I can't believe I did this again - I can believe it - I don't think when I start gorging...I just shovel and shovel and shovel. This time it was cookies; I ate (without exaggeration) three dozen cookies in two days. Five dozen in the course of a week. I have a cookie issue. I also have a food wasting issue. I shoved a stale cookie in my mouth and after chewing most of it - spit it into the garbage - I realized it was gross, and sending it off to Africa to feed a child isn't the answer here.

I'm examining my food issue (again)...this time I want to look at waste. My guilt over "wasting" food. I have some help on the wagon this time - J (and ww J- confusing?) are my life lines to sanity.

This is only day three. I can climb back down this hill.

Static

My to-do list and time are not coordinating very well. I have a lot I've already accomplished, thanks in part to some great team work. However, I feel like when I finish one project there are three more waiting at its end.

I've got all these ideas for crafty little projects. I'm hoping I'll actually do them, take pictures and post. Hope...

Off to sort through six months of accumulated junk toys, bag them up before the Bug sees them and haul them off to donate.

I miss you. I hope you know that.

A long time coming

So much has happened that I really should’ve been better at recording on this blog. So much with D, J, my family, and mostly me.

I’ve been so confused about life that I’ve started doubting my ability to make decisions. Which is silly. Only I know what it is that I want. It’s been nice having a good sounding board - however horribly I’ve treated him. It’s easy to get frustrated when things aren’t easy. And combine that with a long (enough) distance relationship and shit goes south sometimes.

This issue with school has been frustrating. However much I want to say I didn’t like it, if I could be in school the rest of my life, I would. I did pretty well, even if I didn’t put in as much effort as I should’ve. So I had this big epiphany - perhaps me not finding a job is happening for a reason.
Drum roll please...

I’m supposed to be back in school. I’m researching all I can about going back to school to become a teacher. A teacher of what you ask? Good question. I’m still debating K-6, or Health Education...am I settling for one? Should I (is it possible) to do both? How long will this take? How will I get through this with D., with J., with my life in general. I need to get a job to support myself in the short term. As much as I hate this - I think I have to do retail (gag, puke, choke) or something mindless to work around school.

In the meantime...I’m finding my way out of this black hole I’ve created. I’ll get there. Someday. What a journey. I have to remember Rome wasn’t built in a day. I need to remember that even though I didn’t go A to B...that I had fun and I learned lessons and I’ve loved and lost and triumphed. Life shouldn’t scare you - it should excite you. In the end I’ll make the right decision - for me, for my son, for my family.